Who Holds the Power in the Room?
I often say to my patients, "You are the healer and I am the facilitator." Most of the time they smile, and sometimes they look at me like I've said something strange. After all, they came to see me. Isn't fixing things my job?
In today's episode of Truth in Motion, I talked about where the words doctor and patient come from. Doctor comes from the Latin docere, to teach. Patient comes from patiens, one who suffers or endures. I love both of those. A doctor is meant to teach. A patient is someone carrying something.
But somewhere along the way, carrying something got mixed up with being powerless.
For a long time, a "good patient" was a compliant patient. You did what you were told. You didn't ask too many questions. The doctor held the authority, and you held still. Many of us still walk into appointments that way without even realizing it. We sit a little smaller. We forget the question we wanted to ask. We leave with a prescription and a follow-up date, and not much understanding.
I don't believe that's how it was meant to be.
There's a line in the Huangdi Neijing, the foundational text of Chinese medicine, that stops me every time: the patient is the root, and the practitioner is the branch. The person getting well is the foundation. I come second. My needles, my herbs, my training are real and they matter. But they are the branch. You are the root.
The same text says that if the patient's spirit doesn't move forward and their will isn't settled, the illness can't be cured. I can't do healing to you. I can walk with you, teach you, and offer you tools. The healing itself happens in you.
That isn't a burden. It's good news. It means you have far more power in your own health than you may have been taught to believe. And you may already be noticing places where you've been handing that power away without meaning to.
Remember our practice this week? We're noticing where our attention goes, who is commanding it, and what it costs. Today, I'd love for you to bring that same noticing into your health. Notice how you feel walking into an appointment. Notice who does most of the talking. Notice whether you leave understanding more, or just holding more paper.
And since I'm asking you to notice who does most of the talking, I need to be honest about something. I'm a talker. I get excited about what I'm learning and what I see, and I love to share it. Sometimes that excitement gets ahead of my listening.
If you've ever sat in my treatment room and felt unheard or talked over, I'm sorry. You deserved better from me. Listening is part of my practice too, and I'm committed to growing in it. A doctor is meant to teach, and a good teacher listens first.
Here's how you can help me do a better job for you. Before your appointment, set an intention. What do you most want from our time together? It doesn't have to be big or perfectly worded. It can be as simple as "I want to feel better," "I want to get clear," or "I want to feel more balanced." Even "I'm not sure yet" is a place to start.
When you walk in with an intention, we both know where we're headed. Your choices make a difference, and this is one of the simplest ones you can make.
You don't have to change anything yet. Just notice. Awareness has a way of quietly shifting things on its own.
Questions to sit with
I love practical application, so here are some questions to carry with you today. Pick one. Let it work on you.
When I walk into a doctor's office, do I feel like a participant or a passenger?
What questions have I been afraid to ask about my own body?
Who taught me what a "good patient" looks like?
Where have I been waiting for someone else to fix what I have the power to tend?
What would it feel like to walk into my next appointment as a full partner in my care?
What is one small thing I can do for my health today, between visits?
The more honestly you answer, the more you may find yourself standing a little taller in your own care.
Words to Carry
My choices make a difference in my healing.
My questions matter.
I can carry something heavy and still be fully awake.
I partner with those who help me heal.
I am open to understanding my body more each day.
Come back tomorrow for Episode 3, where we get practical: what the practice of medicine really means, and how to be a proactive patient.
With you every step of the way,
Dr. Jocelyn
