Where Do You Feel It?
In 2005, cardiologists at Johns Hopkins described patients whose hearts had nearly stopped pumping right after a sudden emotional shock, often the death of someone they loved. Grief had reached into the body and changed the shape of a heart. And within a few weeks, every one of those hearts recovered.
I believe we are not four separate parts. Body, mind, emotion and spirit are one living system. What touches one touches all of them. And that means every part of your life can become a door to healing.
Here's how to start seeing those connections in your own life, starting today.
Step 1: Try the lemon
Close your eyes and picture a bright yellow lemon, cool from the refrigerator. Picture a knife slicing it in half, and the juice running onto the cutting board. Now bring one half to your mouth and squeeze.
Is your mouth watering?
For most of us, it is. And there's no lemon. A picture in the mind made the body act. Keep that in mind for the rest of this. Your body is listening to every thought and feeling, all day long.
Step 2: Keep a "where do I feel it" log
For the next week, keep a simple log on your phone or on paper. Each time you notice a strong feeling, write down three things:
What I'm feeling: worry, anger, sadness, excitement, dread, relief.
Where I feel it in my body: jaw, throat, chest, stomach, shoulders, hands, low back.
What was happening just before.
You don't need to write much. "Worried about the bill. Stomach knotted. After opening the mail." That's plenty.
Step 3: Look for your patterns
After a few days, read your log from the top. Most of us start to see that our feelings have favorite addresses.
A few patterns people often find:
Worry settles in the stomach, and digestion acts up on the hardest days.
Frustration tightens the jaw or the shoulders by late afternoon.
Grief sits heavy in the chest, or makes breathing feel shallow.
Fear shows up as a racing heart or restless sleep.
Circle any pattern you see more than twice. That's a connection your body has been showing you all along.
Step 4: Use every door
Here's the hopeful part. If hurt in one part spreads to the others, healing spreads too. So choose one small thing from each door this week:
Body: a ten-minute walk outside, or three slow breaths with a hand on the spot from your log.
Mind: notice one thought that keeps the alarm ringing, and ask, "Is it true?"
Emotion: name the feeling out loud, to yourself or someone you trust. Naming it often softens it.
Spirit: a few quiet minutes of prayer, gratitude, or stillness with God.
Each door reaches the whole you, because there's only one you to reach.
Step 5: Bring the whole picture with you
If your tests have come back "normal" but you still don't feel well, your log is valuable. Bring it to your next appointment. "My stomach flares on the days I'm most worried" tells a practitioner far more than "my stomach hurts."
In my own practice, every part of a person is welcome. I ask about stress and emotions because they're part of the physical picture. Different kinds of care reach different parts of the same person, and you deserve care that sees all of you.
A practice for today
The next time a strong feeling shows up, pause and ask, "Where do I feel this in my body?" Place a hand there. Take three slow breaths. Then say quietly, "I notice you." You don't have to fix anything. You're simply letting the parts of you talk to each other again.
Words to Carry
-I am one person, not separate parts.
-My feelings live in my body, and my body listens.
-Every part of my life can be a door to healing.
-When I notice, I begin to heal.
-What touches one part of me touches all of me.
Next time, we look at what's more than we can see.
With you every step of the way,
Dr. Jocelyn
References
Wittstein, I. S., Thiemann, D. R., Lima, J. A., Baughman, K. L., Schulman, S. P., Gerstenblith, G., Wu, K. C., Rade, J. J., Bivalacqua, T. J., & Champion, H. C. (2005). Neurohumoral features of myocardial stunning due to sudden emotional stress. New England Journal of Medicine, 352(6), 539–548.
